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Now, we know wacko jacko Michael Jackson is dead and many people are ignoring parts of celebrating his life. You may remember the thriller dance done by the prison inmates. To continue on from what Nate’s talking about with dem tributes. Here’s the same prison paying their respects to the jacko MJ. Which makes the Philippines prison system a buy.

For the record. This is the weirdiest thing I have seen in a while. Yes, they are doing the thriller dance to “I’ll Be There.”

Also, why are there nuns?

Just a few months ago everyone asked “Who is Bradley Cooper?” when (false) rumors arose that he was cast as the Green Latern. But then The Hangover came out and was a box office smash, making $16.3M opening day. Now he is awesome. He is even cast along side Liam Neeson in the A-Team!

But B.C. is letting me down. He’s the man! So why is he “monkeying” around and down with Jennifer Aniston! Aniston just seems to taint every guy she dates. Now he’s as good as trash! (Proof!) Basically… dating Jennifer Aniston is a loss of points. She used to be the hot one on Friends (probably because a lack of other choices), but even after a nude photo shoot, she’s still “doggedly” unattractive.

Poor Bradley Cooper. His star is finally rising for the first time since his 2001 Alias role, only to be crushed by PR dating stunt or just poor dating decision. Look what happened to John Mayer. He was gonna be a ladies man, exploring “body wonderlands“, now he’s claim to fame is that he had a rocky romance with Aniston.

Transcend Coop!

Image Source: I Watch Stuff

As well all know Michael Jackson died last week, along with Farrah Fawcett and Ed McMahon. But that does not mean that every celebrity died regardless of how much as the Internet wants us to believe.

Rumor had it that Jeff Goldblum died. And Britney Spears. And Harrison Ford. And Ellen DeGeneres. The rumor mill has even come full circle. Yep, that’s right. Rumor has it that MJ’s still alive and kicking.

All the gullible people really ruin the Internet for me sometimes. Not to mention, all these hoaxes just seem to be jinxing other “celebrities.” RIP Billy Mays.

Posted without comment:

You know how the media finds one quote and blows it out of proportion? Well, that’s what I am going to do here.

Stephen Moyer who plays the lame, “responsible” vampire on HBO’s True Blood had this to say about Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight vampire star Robert Patterson:

He’s a pussy! He’s the Slim-Fast, Diet Coke of vampires.

Awesome! Let the battle begin. I’m personally playing Sweden in this war. After all, both vampire adaptations have something enjoyable. I love True Blood for its drama, twists and turns and more dynamic characters. However, I love Twilight for the opposite. Twilight has unintended humor, blatantly lame plot lines, and creepy characters. I also like that Twilight breaks the rules, while True Blood follows them. However both vampires avoid drinking human blood.

So which vampire would win? IDK! Vampire Bill has got sharp fangs, a need for speed, and has sex with no reservations which in fact makes him less of a pussy. However, Twilight’s Edward Cullen doesn’t have a desire to recycle (making him at least less nerdy) and he is older, which in the True Blood world makes him the stronger vampire.

In a battle scenario, who knows what would happen. Bill seems to have more powers, while Edward can just stand there and sparkle. However, that sparkling power comes from being in the daylight. It is possible that Edward is a pussy and would just burn Bill’s house down.

So what “team” are you on?

Source: ONTD, Feoamante, BuddyTV, SMH

This is the Iranian Men’s Nation Soccer team. Four of these players wore green wrist bands in support of Mir Hossein Mousavi at their last match. They have recieved life-time bans retired from the team.

How about some post-game analysis?

Iran’s government is completely exposed, it seems like most people agree with the protesters, insane amounts of media coverage on the global stage.

How do you gain sympathy for your establishment?

Life-time bans. Retirement? Brilliant.

Final score::
Iran Soccer: 4, Iran Government: Nil
Man of the match: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, shine on you crazy diamond.

People say they don’t like or understand twitter but it has given a voice to the voiceless. You gotta respect that.

(Deadspin, Via The Gaurdian)

I’m Mr. Bucket. Put your balls in my top. I’m Mr. Bucket. The balls fly outta my mouth. I’m Mr. Bucket.

Still waiting for Mrs. Bucket to come out, am I right?

Chuck Grassley is a United States Senator from Iowa. He has been in politics since 1959. He is a member of the Senate Judiciary Committee, the Senate Committee on Agriculture and the Senate Finance Committee, of which he has twice been the Chair. He is also a grown man capable of expressing himself like an adult.

Which is why his Twitter is so disheartening:

Pres Obama you got nerve while u sightseeing in Paris to tell us”time to deliver” on health care. We still on skedul/even workinWKEND.

and

Pres Obama while u sightseeing in Paris u said ‘time to delivr on healthcare’ When you are a “hammer” u think evrything is NAIL I’m no NAIL

and

My carbon footprint is abt 25per cent of Al Gore. I’m greener than Al Gore. Is that enuf?

This is not an attack on Grassley. When sentences written by a 75-year-old man with a Masters in Poli-Sci are indistinguishable from sentences written by 13-year-old girls, it’s probably the mode of communication they’re using that’s the problem.

Mr. Pibb is a soft drink. I happen to love Mr. Pibb. It’s probably my favorite soda ever.

However, Mr. Pibb is now know as Pibb Xtra as demonstrated here:

So what ever happened to Mr. Pibb?

I have some soda fan fiction to answer this question…

In a small town in Texas, known to the locals as Waco a couple has a child. They named their child Pepperoncini.

He would be known to his friends as “Pepper.”

Pepper had your normal childhood and was content just being around. This was until his parents had another child. Pibbo.

He would be known to his friends as “Pibb”

Pibbo wasn’t the brightest child but was well liked. This bothered Pepper who became more driven to show that he was the best.

Pepper decided to go to Soft Drink Medical School and became Dr. Pepper. He was later sued for malpractice and became Dr Pepper but landed his own daytime talk show and is now doing better then ever.

Pibb not to be outdone decided to also go to Soft Drink Medical School but after the first year decided it was too tough and dropped out. He is however a licensed chiropractor cause thats all bullshit anyway.

Pibb knew he was destined for something more and moved to the big city. There he met the one and only Miss Coca Cola who was impressed by the young Pibb and decided to take him under her wing.

Coca signed Pibb to a big contract and in 1978 Pibb had was shown to the world.

However, after lackluster sales and interest and the rise of his brother Dr Pepper. Pibb was cast into the shadow.

Coca released him in the winter of 2001. Later that year Pibb got some plastic surgery and renamed himself Pibb Xtra. Coca took him back there after and now Pibb Xtra can be seen doing his lounge act.

And can be found in Americanized Mexican fast food chains (Chipotle, Moe’s, Baja Fresh) and other sporadic drink fountains across the country.

It could be worse… They could be like their cousin Baja Blast Mountain Dew… Which is in an unhealthy relationship with Taco Bell. One day she’ll understand she’s better then that.

The End…

(I thought of this whole retarded ass post over a burrito at Baja Fresh.)

non-sequitur

I looked up “reaction video” on UrbanDictionary:

A video, typically posted on YouTube, that depicts someone’s reaction to seeing or being shown a disturbing or frightening image or video. This is usually a shock site, a screamer or something similar.

This is a really lame concept. It’s the cheap-ass version of Sci Fi’s Scare Tactics: give the audience the mildly-amusing freak-out that comes at the end, but none of the ridiculous set-up that actually makes the reaction worth seeing.

The result is stupid crap like this:

The Fangirl Phenomenon, however, has taken this practice to a new low. (I know, I know: Who ever thought our culture could get lower than 3,000,000+ views for a video entitled “2 Girls 1 Cup Grandma Reaction”?) While the previous video does, I’m sure, have some comedic value for a certain subset of frat boy types, fangirl reaction videos offer no such benefits.

Yes, you see correctly: this is a NINE-MINUTE reaction video to a NINETY-SECOND movie trailer. I think we’ve got Britain’s hottest new acting talent here, because she goes from delight to devastation to total fear to silent shock in the span of a minute, and having seen the New Moon trailer myself, I can assure you that the trailer itself is not capable of provoking that much emotion.

This type of “reaction video” is even worse than the first example because it is 100% self-indulgent and 100% fake. Although 2G1C Grandma was probably in on the joke, I could at least sort of believe that was unplanned. But there is no way someone who already read the damn book would be brought to tears by RPattz’s insistance that he leave his lady-love to save her. And what about her horrified squeal when she sees a shirtless guy morph into a wolf? Has she never seen CGI before? Thank you so much, nuttymadam3575, for giving me the opportunity to watch you intentionally flail and moan and gasp as you watch a video for which you’ve already practiced your cues.

The entire concept of making videos of YOURSELF while you watch something is completely inane. It is attention-whoring to a whole new degree. The people who make these somehow assume that their own scripted shit-flipping is of interest to the world. Well, um, it’s not. Especially when it’s about a fucking Twilight movie.